If ever there was a tasting to look forward to — and to return to over and over — it has to be cheese crackers. Salty, tangy, crispy and crunchy, crackers made with cheese are the kind of snack that deserves an invite to every party, anytime, anywhere.
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While one ubiquitous brand of cheese crackers dominates the market with dozens of different varieties, we decided it was time to give other cheese crackers a chance. We grabbed a box of the iconic Cheez-Its, of course, plus 11 other brands, and gave them a taste.
On our quest for cheesy deliciousness, we discovered a few issues related to cracker selection. First, be aware that in most cases, crackers that are labeled “cheez” or “cheeze” as opposed to cheese often do not contain cheese at all. If cheese is what you’re after, be sure to read the fine-print. Also good to know: Price has nothing to do with quality. Lots of yucky crackers are double, even triple the cost of the tastiest versions.
The best cheesy crackers are crispy, tangy and entirely cheesy. They can be any color, any shape, but they need to deliver the decadent flavor of cheddar. Bad cheesy crackers are a total miss. They taste like cardboard or have strange, unwelcome textures — or smell absolutely foul.
Here are details on the most flavorful cheese-centric crackers and the “cheese” crackers that don’t deserve the title. Nutrition info refers to 30 grams, or 12 to 18 pieces, depending on size.
Cheddies Double Cheddar Cheesy Crackers
These do not have the iconic orange color, nor do they have the tender crispness of many cheese crackers, but don’t be fooled. These crunchy shapes taste like homemade cheese crackers. 139 calories, 5 g fat, 204 mg sodium, 1 g sugar, 6 g protein. $4.99 for 4.2 ounces at Whole Foods. (4 stars)
Cheez-Its Extra Cheesy
The extra tang in this particular variety comes from a dusting of cheese powder that is meant to bump up the cheese flavor. Whether it does or not is arguable, but these tasty, salty, cheesy crackers are nonetheless mouthwateringly cheesy — and dangerously addictive. 150 calories, 8 g fat, 270 mg sodium, 3 g protein. $3.78 for 12.4 ounces at Walmart. (4 stars)
Blue Diamond Cheddar Cheese Almond Nut-Thins
While these messy rounds coated in cheese powder are more nutty than cheesy, they are yummy nonetheless. 130 calories, 4 g fat, 250 mg sodium, 3 g protein. $3.59 for 4.25 ounces at Target. (3½ stars)
Patagonia Provisions Toasted Cheeze Organic Crackers
These delicate, dairy free crackers are a serious triumph. They have understated flavor, but they definitely taste like cheese. The cheese flavor comes from an artful blend of yeast, lactic acid and sourdough. 140 calories, 5 g fat, 240 mg sodium, 2 g sugar, 3 g protein. $5.49 for 4.4 ounces at Whole Foods. (3 stars)
Great Value Cheddar Cheese Crackers
Handsome, crispy squares that look like Cheez-Its make a great start, but they need more cheese. On the upside, the lack of cheese flavor is guaranteed to quash the urge to binge. 160 calories, 8 g fat, 230 mg sodium, 2 g protein. $2.48 for 12.4 ounces at Walmart. (3 stars)
Pretzelized Snacks Cheddar Pretzel Crackers
Crackly, extra-salty crackers are always good, but putting cheddar in the title is misleading. There’s nothing cheesy about these. 130 calories, 4.5 g fat, 490 mg sodium, 1 g sugar, 3 g protein. $3.50 for 6.5 ounces on sale at Raley’s. (2½ stars)
365 Whole Foods Organic Cheddar Square Crackers
Crispy texture, a hint of garlic and a smidge of cheese flavor earn these crackers a tentative thumbs-up. They’re OK, but guaranteed to disappoint lovers of cheddar cheese. 140 calories, 7 g fat, 270 mg sodium, 3 g protein. $3.49 for 7 ounces at Whole Foods. (2 stars)
Ritz Toasted Chips
A generous dusting of bold-flavored powdery cheese delivers a burst of cheesiness, but the sweet finish on the cracker seems out of place. 150 calories, 6 g fat, 290 mg sodium, 3 g sugar, 2 g protein. $3.92 for 8.1 ounces at Walmart. (2 stars)
Simple Mills Almond Flour Crackers Farmhouse Cheddar
The cheese flavor simply can’t compete with the powerful thwack of slightly bitter onion and garlic in these hard, dry, crackers. 150 calories, 1.5 g fat, 230 mg sodium, 1 g sugar, 3 g protein. $3.99 for 4.25 ounces at Raley’s. (1 star)
Annie’s Organic Cheddar Squares
These look the part and are pleasantly crunchy and crispy, but it’s as if someone forgot to add the cheese. 140 calories, 6 g fat, 260 mg sodium, 3 g protein. $5.99 for 7.5 ounces at Raley’s. (½ a star)
Mary’s Organic Gone Cheezee Crackers
Sorry, Mary. You may think you captured the flavor of cheese here, but you didn’t. These hard rectangles flavored with plant-based cheese have a touch of garlic and taste burned. 140 calories, 6 g fat, 270 mg sodium, 1 g sugar, 4 g protein. $5.49 for 4.25 ounces at Raley’s. (½ a star)
Nabisco Better Cheddars
These delicate rounds are flaky and fun to look at, but they smell just awful. Their scent is so sour and rank, it takes courage to put a cracker in your mouth. 160 calories, 8 g fat, 260 mg sodium, 3 g protein. $5.49 for 6.5 ounces at Safeway. (No stars)
Reviews are based on product samples purchased by this newspaper or provided by manufacturers. Contact Jolene Thym at timespickyeater@gmail.com. Read more Taste-off columns at www.mercurynews.com/tag/taste-off.
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