It’s 2020, and Douglas Spreng is on a mission — to find a romantic companion.
Fresh off of his second divorce, the 81-year-old retiree had spent most of that year on a dating website. He was looking for someone who lived nearby, meshed well with his personality and enjoyed the same hobbies he did, like traveling and watching movies.
“I just made it my top priority,” Spreng recalled. “I really, really did want to have a companion.”
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He saw maybe 20 prospects that year, even making it a rule to meet each woman in person at least two times before deciding whether to continue. They were all nice dates, he said, but nothing worked out.
Then a friend recommended an alternative to online dating: Shannon’s Circle, a San Francisco-based matchmaking service run by Shannon Lundgren. For a few thousand dollars, the Harvard MBA alum could curate a list of personalized prospects for Spreng. Her website advertised an 80% success rate for finding relationships.
Spreng was intrigued by the idea but decided not to go down the matchmaker route until he developed a little more experience in the dating field.
In 2021, he found his way into the circle.
In an age where opportunities to find love in person are dwindling and emotional fatigue from using dating apps is rising, some Bay Area residents such as Spreng have turned to the time-honored tradition of matchmaking to meet their soulmates. But there is also resistance from those who feel that finding a partner should be left in their own hands.
A matchmaker’s goal is simple: to help a singleton find a romantic partner. But more work goes into it than one might think, according to Lundgren. Matchmakers take the time to understand their client’s personality, values and goals before introducing them to someone based on their compatibility and desired traits.
The website of the machmaking service Shannon’s Circle is seen on Tuesday, Feb. 11, 2025. (Dai Sugano/Bay Area News Group)
“They’re experts that really can take a lot of the time, angst and frustration out of finding your ‘needle in the haystack,’ “she said. “They find quality dates for you so that you don’t have to swipe through thousand of profiles on your own, or try to find someone in real life on your own.”
There are more than 2,000 matchmakers across the nation, and the Bay Area boasts more than a dozen services scattered across San Francisco and the South and East Bay. Some are locally owned, like Shannon’s Circle, but others are branches of national, and even international, matchmaking empires.
In the upcoming years, international matchmaking services revenues are predicted to grow an average of 3.5% annually, according to industry data. The profession has a global estimated worth of $1.2 billion to $1.5 billion, with nearly half of the market in the U.S.
Even during the COVID-19 pandemic, industry trackers state that 73% of matchmakers were still meeting clients. And demand only increased.
“Definitely during the pandemic, it skyrocketed,” Lundgren said.
Each month, around 40 to 50 people will sign up to join Shannon’s Circle’s database of singles, but Lundgren will only take 20 clients at a time, she said. The typical matchmaking process can take between six months to a year. The price for her services varies depending on each client’s search, with packages falling in the five-figure range.
“It’s very intimate, the process of helping someone find their person,” she said. “You want to make sure who you take on you truly, truly can help.”
The matchmaking task begins with Lundgren setting up a consultation with her client to better understand their background, interests and current lifestyle, among other topics. She’ll dive into their relationship history, and scope out what type of person her clients hope to meet.
Then Lundgren taps into her exclusive database of available singles in the area to search for the right person. When she locates and screens a potential date, she’ll reach out to the client to confirm mutual interest before introducing them.
Lundgren collects feedback from both parties after each date to help refine their search. If her clients hit it off right away, she’ll stick around for a little bit before eventually stepping back and letting love take its course.
Just as in any dating situation, it can take time for a match to form. Even Spreng went through several dates on Shannon’s Circle before finally meeting Peggy Lucchesi, 77 — also known as “The One.”
Douglas Spreng and his wife, Peggy Lucchesi, at their Los Altos home on Tuesday, Feb. 11, 2025. (Dai Sugano/Bay Area News Group)
Lucchesi had moved to Lafayette from New Jersey in 2014 to live with her daughter and grandkids. She had set up a profile through Linx Dating, a Menlo Park-based matchmaking service, which Lundgren found when she reached out to Linx in hopes of finding more matches.
Spreng’s first meeting with Lucchesi was supposed to be a 45-minute get-to-know-you Zoom call. Instead, they talked for two hours. On their first date a few days later, they met at Lucchesi’s daughter’s home for lunch and a summertime swim. By the third or fourth month of dating, Lucchesi had moved in with Spreng in Los Altos.
“When we were together just talking, or doing stuff together, we just flowed,” Spreng said. “It was amazing,”
The pair also shared similar interests. Together they’ve traveled to Big Sur and Santa Barbara, Turkey and Italy. Not only are both keen on movies, they’ve also hosted multiple Oscar parties complete with competitions and mini-trophies.
They tied the knot in August 2024, with a wedding reception at the Los Altos Golf and Country Club, surrounded by friends and family. It’s an opportunity he might have missed, Spreng said, if it wasn’t for Shannon’s Circle.
“Who knows, I could still be looking — or maybe given up by now and decided I was just going to be a bachelor for the rest of my life,” he said. “Fortunately, it was just the opposite.”
A wedding photo of Douglas Spreng and his wife, Peggy Lucchesi, is displayed at their Los Altos home on Tuesday, Feb. 11, 2025. (Dai Sugano/Bay Area News Group)
But not everyone who pays to use a matchmaker is sold on its prospects. For the past few years, San Jose resident Jossolyn Koster has tried to find love through multiple worldwide matchmaking services, including SEI Club and Millionaire Match.
The 39-year-old eventually called it quits for various reasons: communication issues with matchmakers, suitors who didn’t work out and pricey monthly payments for their services.
“I’ve had much better luck on dating apps than I have on this matchmaking journey,” she said.
Koster thinks the concept of matchmaking can be helpful, but only if the person trusts and knows the true personalities of the parties they are trying to set up. Otherwise, she said, it’s not ideal.
“Having a third party who doesn’t know anything about each of those parties, beyond what those parties tell them and self-reporting, is very skewed and very biased” she said. “I think it is not the most helpful mechanism to use.”
And then there are those like Millbrae resident Stephen Orquiza, who see matchmaking services as just another tool in the toolbox people can use to find romance.
The single 32-year-old often opts for local speed-dating events and the occasional dating apps, which seem to be the only options these days, he said. Orquiza said he’s open to using a matchmaking service but doesn’t think too much of its promises.
“If I have the chance, I would try it,” he said. “If it works, it works. But if not, no hard feelings.”
